What Does It Mean To Be Authentic?
Authenticity.
A word that’s oversaturated our vocabulary and thoughts. It’s to the point where a group of 100 people could each have their personal definition. It’s actually one of my words for this year (if you don’t know what I’m talking about, read this post here). I see this term A LOT. But what does it mean to be authentic and live an intentional life like that?
There are actually a few components that go into living a life of intentionality and presence, which is what authenticity is all about. Once we have the whole picture, I’ll talk about how I put them all together to create an authentic life worth living.
Radical Honesty & Radical Self-Acceptance
The first part of embodying authenticity is that you have to be honest with yourself. And I mean cutthroat, ruthlessly honest with yourself. If we can’t show all of ourselves in private, how do we expect to do it with others?
You have to ready to face all of who you are — including the shadow aspects of you. Especially the parts that you have given shame and guilt and “wrongness” to. Newsflash: there’s nothing wrong with you. Having shadow aspects doesn’t make those parts of you wrong or scary. It just means that it’s a part of you that you may be ignoring or hiding. I am a massive supporter of integrating the shadow, by the way.
We have to stop hiding our light. Yes, every part of you is light and wonderful, even the shadowy parts. Want to know why? Because they all make up the brilliance of who you are. And that’s utterly wonderful.
The second half of radical honesty is radical self-acceptance. Once we’re honest with ourselves, we have to look at all of who we are and accept that we are worthy of love, respect, and anything else in life in this very moment. I know that can be hard. We live in a world where improving yourself is akin to success (especially if you’re a part of the spiritual metacommunity). But what if you’re everything you need right now? What if life wasn’t about correcting who we are but experiencing life and enjoying it?
Once you reach a place of true self-acceptance, being authentic and living that life comes easily.
Trusting Yourself
Now, I’ve mentioned trusting yourself a few times in my blog. And I’ll keep saying it until people start trusting themselves and taking a chance on themselves. Trusting yourself is key to living the life you want! But how can you start trusting yourself? I’ll tell you!
1. Write down everything amazing about you. I’m serious. When we remind ourselves of who we are and what we’re capable of, our trust increases. If you’re having trouble, you can ask someone else to describe your amazingness
2. Start small! If you’ve never trusted yourself on big decisions, I recommend you don’t start there. Start trusting yourself over making small decisions, and work your way up to more significant decisions. The more powerful of a decision you make, the more trust it requires.
3. Trust is a choice and a follow=through on action. When you understand those things, you see that trust is a continuous process to keep following our yeses in life.
Sincere Authenticity
Now, developing all of these skills is a process, and trying to do it all overnight will set you up for failure. But as you continue to grow, it all starts to flow together. One thing about authenticity is that we need to know our true nature. If you want, you can take this question and journal a bit: beyond relationships, institutional structures, and beliefs, who are you as a core human being? What is your true nature?
Sincere authenticity is being true to yourself. But what does being true to yourself mean? It means standing in alignment with your current truth and having your reality reflect that by taking actions that are in alignment. We need the pieces of radical honesty, radical self-acceptance, and trusting yourself to truly embody authenticity.
We need to know that our understanding of ourselves will most likely change, and so, our definition of what’s authentic to us will change. But that’s the fun of it! If we could figure ourselves out and be done with all this, we’d get bored quickly. One thing I know when starting this healing work is to make the transition periods fun. You do not have to define yourself. Being aligned is being in energetic balance, our flow state. And if it feels right for you, go for it!
That’s it for this week! If you want more from me, you can check out the links here and here!
